Going to Pot in the Netherlands

Sorry about the pun.

A couple of months ago, I asked my hotel concierge where to go to get high.  He suggested “#36,” a bar located a few blocks from the hotel.

I bypassed most of the “turn on/tune in/drop out” experience of the late 60s and early 70s.  I occasionally got drunk and enjoyed listening to the Doors (and other rock bands of the era), but that is as crazy as I got.  As for the sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll thing, it was strictly rock-n-roll for me.

The “#36” bar, located in the older part of town, has a decidedly young clients.  The artistic mural on one of the bar’s long walls venerates the “hippie” generation.  Everyone in the place was smoking joint.  The DJ, who was playing loud techno-rock and disco, was also dispensing the goods.

Having never smoked (and like Bill Clinton never inhaled), I decided to try the brownie delivery system.  According to the instructions on the brownie package:

TAKE YOUR TIME!  It takes 1 to 1-1/2 hours to feel the full effects (lasts 3 to 5 hours).  Don’t take more than 1 or mix with alcohol or other drugs.

I asked the DJ about playing some Doors music.  Unfortunately, she didn’t have any.  The only “old” music that she had was Elvis singing Christmas songs.  (I’m not making this up.)

After waiting for over 2 hours without getting much of a buzz, I decided to try a joint.  The first puff inflicted on me a serious coughing episode.  I soon became the entertainment in the bar (the 68-year-old virgin, so to speak).  My coughing seemed to animate the stoned crowd.

The bartender suggested that I try no more than 3 hits in a row.  And gave me instructions on how to inhale (keep the smoke in my mouth and then swallow).  Eventually, I was able to blow the smoke out my nose.  Does this mean I’m inhaling?

After I had pretty much finished the joint, I had only a mild buzz.  The DJ said that people frequently expect too much.  Mildly inebriated (half drunk), I decided it was time to leave the bar.  I fist bumped the DJ and bartender.  They had been very nice.

I went to a corner sandwich shop and got some fries and a tuna sandwich.  I then went back to my hotel room and fell asleep.  A very anti-climatic ending to a seriously strange day.  (And there was no hangover.)