I’ve always been confused about Mormon church attire. (And this post isn’t about short skirts, low necklines, and bare shoulders.) Why is it worshipful for men to wear suits that make them look like undertakers or attorneys in third-rate law firms? Why is it okay for women to wear denim skirts, T-shirts, and sandals (with no socks), but it not okay for Mormon men to wear Levis, T-shirts (solid color with no writing or images), and sandals (with or without socks)?
And recently, Robert Kirby asked the question that all Mormon men have been asking for years: “Why can’t Mormons just say no to neckties?” In a column for the sltrib, he mused:
Stop to think about a necktie for a moment. There’s nothing useful about them. They don’t offer protection from the elements. They’re not antennas for the Holy Ghost. What purpose do they actually serve?
Correct answer: convention.
Neckties are a symbol that you’re in harmony with the spirit of things, which is generally understood by us to mean “obedience.”
But Brother Kirby failed to mention the biggest problem with neckties. According to Rebekah Aaron, commenting on Kirby’s column:
Has anyone really thought about just how inappropriate ties really are? I mean it’s a giant brightly colored ARROW on a white nondescript background that points directly to a man’s crotch. How much more suggestive can you get?
And Sister Aaron didn’t leave it at that:
I feel visually assaulted every time I attend church. I think we should ban ties altogether, just to save the virtue of the poor women. We cannot possibly control our thoughts when we are seeing so much “walking porn.”
It’s time to make a change in the way Mormon males dress for church. How about colored shirts (top button open), no tie, slacks, and nice shoes or sandals. (Another option would be to insist that Mormon females wear ties.) Mormon feminists are making their voices heard concerning attire, what about liberating Mormon males?